The internet is a vast, quirky landscape. It’s a place where memes destroy and rebuild, cat videos heal broken spirits, and sarcastic banter (see reddit) bridges generational divides. But lurking in the shadows of this digital carnival are those who either cannot—or will not—laugh. They are the "Humorless Internet", the laughing invalids, and maybe this is a behavior that comes with purpose. In my earnest opinion, this is often selective behavior, deployed nefariously to one-up or best well-intentioned people.
And yes, this phenomenon is alive and well in the UFO community. For a group that thrives on the mysterious and unexplained, it’s ironic how seriously some members take themselves—to the point of banishing humor entirely. Let’s explore how this dynamic plays out, both broadly and within the realm of UFO enthusiasts.
Here's my take on these curious characters and the ripples they create in the chaotic waters of the goddamned internet.
What does an internet user devoid of humor look like? While the exact traits vary, there are a few hallmark behaviors:
Literal Interpretations of Jokes: Imagine posting a tweet saying, “I’m so hungry I could eat a horse,” only for someone to reply, “Actually, eating horses is unethical in many cultures.” You’re left scratching your head, wondering if they truly believe you’re eyeing the neighbor’s mare for dinner.
Overanalysis of Playful Comments: A simple “That’s what she said” joke might inspire a 500-word comment thread dissecting sexism in modern humor. Nuance is lost, and the lighthearted moment dies a slow, painful death.
Immediate Offense Taken: Even the most absurd, hyperbolic jokes can be misinterpreted. It’s as if some users patrol the web, ready to pounce on the slightest deviation from their own worldview.
Imagine telling someone, “It’s raining cats and dogs,” and instead of chuckling, they lecture you on the dangers of animal cruelty. That’s the vibe.
In UFO circles, this behavior can manifest in peculiar ways. Crack a joke about aliens refusing to visit Earth because of our questionable reality TV lineup, and you might find yourself accused of trivializing the serious work of extraterrestrial researchers. What starts as lighthearted banter can quickly spiral into a grim defense of the "truth." Try speaking too much truth on a fringe show, it gets hotter even more quickly.
Humorless behavior isn’t always malicious. Sometimes, it’s the result of understandable factors:
Cultural or Language Barriers: Humor doesn’t translate perfectly across languages or cultures. Sarcasm and idioms, in particular, can lose their charm (or meaning) when they cross borders.
Tone Loss in Text: The absence of vocal inflection, facial expressions, and body language can make it harder to detect humor in written form. The internet’s primary mode of communication doesn’t always do jokes justice.
Genuine Lack of Comedic Sensibility: Some people just don’t find things funny, and that’s okay. Everyone has different tastes.
However, in UFO circles, there’s an additional layer to this phenomenon. The subject matter—aliens, government cover-ups, mysterious encounters—already sits on the fringes of mainstream acceptance. As a result, many in the community feel a heightened need to legitimize their beliefs, often at the expense of humor. Jokes can be perceived as an attack, a dismissal of their worldview, or an attempt to undermine their credibility. And don't be fooled, the narratives haven't flipped nearly as much as rumored - conspiracy nutters are still conspiracy nutters, but I digress...
Sometimes, being humorless isn’t just a personality quirk—it’s a strategy. Here’s how:
Dominating Conversations: By reframing jokes as offensive or inappropriate, humorless individuals can derail discussions and seize control of the narrative. The original speaker often finds themselves backpedaling, explaining, or apologizing for a harmless quip.
Claiming Moral Superiority: “I’m too serious for jokes” becomes a badge of honor, signaling that the humorless individual is somehow more thoughtful or ethical than their jesting peers.
Derailing Lighthearted Moments: Some people thrive on conflict and tension, using their lack of humor to sour otherwise positive interactions. A cheerful exchange can quickly turn into a debate over semantics or ethics.
It’s one thing to not get the joke—it’s another to use that as a moral high ground to ‘win’ the argument. It’s not humor they’re missing; it’s strategy they’re employing.
The humorless often have a chilling effect on digital spaces. Their presence can:
Stifle Creativity: When every joke is scrutinized or criticized, people may hesitate to share their humor, fearing backlash or misunderstanding.
Create Tension: A single humorless comment can shift the tone of an entire thread or conversation, turning playful banter into a strained debate.
Discourage Engagement: Who wants to interact with someone who’s always serious? The fear of being misinterpreted can push well-meaning users into silence. (This is perhaps most important, for without engagement you are left with a typical, basic bunch of assholes!)
In a world so absurd, humor is our common language—or at least, it should be. The internet, with all its chaos and contradictions, needs humor to stay sane. And for a community like UFO enthusiasts, embracing a bit of levity can be a powerful way to connect with others and share their passion.
But if you find yourself up against a stone-faced humor vacuum, just remember: their seriousness says more about them than it does about your joke.
Maybe the humorless aren’t laughing because they don’t want to… or maybe they’re just biding their time, waiting for the right moment to derail your next punchline.
So go forth, be funny, and don’t let the humorless get you down. After all, if laughter is contagious, maybe there’s hope for them yet. Even aliens might appreciate a good joke—if they’re out there watching us, let’s at least give them something to laugh about.
Vigiland – 'UFO'
This 2014 track by Swedish duo Vigiland features an energetic music video that complements their signature electronic dance style.
Sneaky Sound System – 'UFO'
Released in 2007, this song by Australian band Sneaky Sound System includes a music video directed by Clement Beauvais, known for its catchy tune and distinctive visuals.
Stellar – 'UFO'
This 2012 release by South Korean girl group Stellar features a music video directed by Hong Won-ki, showcasing the group's pop sound and choreography.
FEMM – 'UFO'
A 2014 track by Japanese duo FEMM, featuring a futuristic music video that aligns with their unique electronic style.
Anyway, eyes to skies and if you know of good groups on X or any platform where I can join in, leave me a message in the comment box.
Pictured: Space Skeleton in a Flower Bed of the Dead
Stay tuned as there's so much more coming your way.
From the article:
Billionaire Elon Musk recently said that he was an "alien" and "nobody believes" him during a recent appearance at the Viva Tech event in Paris. The presenter questioned him about rumours of his extraterrestrial origins, the SpaceX and Tesla Chief laughed and replied, "I am an alien. Yeah, I keep saying I'm an alien, but nobody believes me." Notably, this was part of a session titled "Everything You Always Wanted To Know About Elon Musk But Were Afraid to Ask," which was inspired by the title of a Woody Allen movie. Mr Musk was speaking virtually and mentioned that he couldn't be there in person since he was attending his son's graduation, as per a report in Euronews.
And what's funny is that the more I learn about our language and annexed "historical" information, I can't say without uncertainty that he is crazy. I do consider Elon, first and foremost, an actor. Check his resume! Not a fan, at least not in the sense that I think he is really just some actor and not the "billionaire" we have all come to admire... Not me. Nope- I'm not buying the fan fiction or any of the Elon story, what can I say, I have a critical mind full of critical thoughts. https://www.ndtv.com/feature/elon-musk-says-he-is-an-alien-claims-nobody-believes-him-5747577
Iron Mountain is a global enterprise famously known for its records management, data backup services, and secure destruction. The company was founded in 1951 and initially started as a vault underground in a depleted iron ore mine, where it protected corporate documents from potential nuclear threats during the Cold War ("Iron Mountain Incorporated," 2020). Today, it operates secure storage facilities in more than 50 countries, housing everything from business records to historical artifacts.
The level of security at some Iron Mountain facilities is indeed reminiscent of something out of a spy movie. For example, their underground facility in Pennsylvania is known for extreme security measures, including armed guards and biometric systems (Markus, 2018). While these measures are publicly justified as necessary for protecting sensitive data from theft or disaster, such security inevitably sparks the imagination. What could be so valuable, or so dangerous, that it requires protection worthy of a Bond villain's lair?
Iron Mountain does store more than just business documents. They have been entrusted with historical treasures and cultural artifacts. For instance, the Corbis collection, owned by Bill Gates, includes millions of historical photographs and images, some of which are stored in Iron Mountain’s facilities (Klein, 2015). This includes iconic images like Einstein sticking out his tongue and portraits of global leaders. The idea that such culturally significant items are stored alongside mundane corporate documents adds a layer of intrigue.
There is even a more personal story I can tell, but at this juncture wouldn't be necessary to add here, it's interesting by its own merit, which bodes well for me. Hey, it's no secret many of top universities have already had Iron Mountain come and digitize their most rare holdings in the basements of their libraries. If you have eyes with the ability to sense an Orwellian standoff, then you are ready to proceed. A library tethered by its digital resources rather than hard copies, 1st printings, out of print documents are compromised in a totalitarian kind of way.
Some speculate that the services provided by Iron Mountain go beyond simple security. In her book Dark Archives: A Librarian's Investigation into the Science and History of Books Bound in Human Skin, Megan Rosenbloom (2020) discusses how institutions like Iron Mountain could theoretically be called upon to protect items that are not only rare but also macabre or controversial, thus needing both physical security and secrecy.
While it’s thrilling to entertain notions of Iron Mountain holding keys to alien communications or Shakespeare’s lost plays, the truth likely leans towards a less dramatic reality. The high level of security and confidentiality is standard for protecting sensitive personal and corporate information in our digital age. However, the blend of high-security protocols with the preservation of historical artifacts certainly gives the imagination a vast playground.
In the end, while Iron Mountain is probably just exceptionally good at safeguarding very important but rather ordinary documents, the fun - straight face - lies in pondering the "what-ifs." Are there undisclosed pieces of history nestled within those secured walls, or is it simply a fortress against data breaches and disasters? In my view - well who cares about my view.. Most of the conspiracies people finally awakening with the vision to comprehend even its tainted beauty, while so simple, can easily get dusted away.
Dear readers, I leave you with this: whether it’s a mountain of secrets or just well-guarded paperwork, Iron Mountain surely knows how to keep us guessing. And in the world of mystery and humor, that’s perhaps the most valuable secret of all.
So, keep your wit about you and your eyes open. You never know what secrets might be hiding in plain sight, shielded by nothing more than our assumptions. In the meanwhile, you know the answer, so go outside and live your life (g), not that "goddamned life" that I have been talking about.
#Propertyofmars
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Founded in 2004, FMPU continues to chug along. I'm going to try to post more often, and I do apologize, there's several broken links carried within, I'm not going to go back and fix em, but Yes I do see those...
Thank you for hanging, the UFO narrative strangely has gone from risk-on to risk-off, safe for discussing, in fact, it seems the more you have to say on any of the particular subcategories the better!
I will have to do some kind of overview at some point.
